Tell me something I don't know.

'Yea, yesterday was pretty interesting. Today will be the same way. Maybe tomorrow will follow suite. And the rest my life will too.

When the dog comes in the room it looks like a ghost has entered, because the door opens wide up. Isn't that strange? My cat is the cutest cat ever. When he dies, I die. Like where the red fern grows.

I have a kindred soul. Did you know? I do. Soul mates are whack. I hope no one believes in that. If you do, I'm sorry. It just doesn't exist. I hate to be the one to break it to you. It makes me angry that someone would waste their question asking "Am I in the right relationship?" Chances are, if you're asking that question, then you're not. You don't need a psychic to answer that question. You should have just asked me.

So if guardian angels exist, are they around when you're having sex? No really, I want to know this. Cause that would be weird. So would your guardian angel hang out with the other person's guardian angel while you two are conducting your business? How does that work, exactly? I would like to know this answer.

On the other side they say that there is no time. Time flies. Years are days, they don't realize it. Apparently we come back when we want. I guess if you get bored enough? How does that work? This life is probably the best one I'm ever going to have. I can't imagine it getting better than it is now. So it won't, I'm sure. It really is the worst time to be living here instead of there. Maybe. I don't know, I could think of some pretty shitty times in history though. Why would you want to leave? I don't think so. 76 years is a mighty long time to live through. Maybe I'll just stay there with my abuelito.